Venus and Mars are Zane Jackson and Fallon Hudson.
Venus and Mars are Zane Jackson and Fallon Hudson.

A difficult subject, period


As a woman I have never been more offended.

It was the last thing I expected see in a nightclub in Rome.

At first I could not make out what the guy was weraing, it looked like a toga with a few splotches of red dye.

It was a fancy dress party and the theme was the letter 'P' and I thought he was dressed as an ancient Roman plebian with puncture wounds.

Sure there were a few priests, pussycats, pirates and prostitutes, but nothing could prepare me for what I saw.

A man dressed as a period.

This bloke was making a mockery fo the plight women have to go through once a month.

It is men like him who still put out that vibe that women are inferior to men, well that's the message I got by his foul joke that was only funny inside his head.

I have seen my fair share of men dressing up as women any chance they can get.

Somehow men get away with dressing as schoolgirls and 'that time of the month' quips, because they think it is funny and clever.

News flash, it's stupid.

Imagine if I dressed as an inflamed prostate on a pub-crawl.

If men want to dress as schoolgirls, wear a dress or lipstick, that is cool.

But if I ever see a man dressed as a menstrual cycle again I will make sure he gets a few cramps.


I'm a 27-year-old bloke and I still find it awkward talking about periods. Not all periods, like full stops or that glorious period when Steve Waugh was our national skipper, but that other one.

The thing is, the menstrual cycle doesn't disturb me because I know it plays an important part in the life cycle.

I had a rough introduction to the world of tampons, which probably explains my problem.

When I was only a youngster a story came on the TV news about a girl dying from toxic shock syndrome. I didn't know what a tampon was at the time, but the news said they were to blame.

I asked my mum what a tampon was. You put what, where? I couldn't believe it.

But I think the biggest contributing factor to making us blokes a bit strange talking aloud about periods is the cringe-worthy advertising you see for tampons and pads.

I've seen plenty of cringe-inducing things in my life - I once glanced at a mirror wall while dancing at a nightclub - but those ads are miserable.

Why can't they just say this is our product, it does its job well, comes in a snazzy container and is reasonably priced?

But no, instead we get plenty of ones where a guy act like buffoons displaying their ignorance over their girlfriend's sanitary needs.

I had a rough introduction to the world of tampons, which probably explains my problem.

Venus and Mars is a weekly humour column written by Fallon Hudson and Zane Jackson.

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